Third kits used: 1
Third kits used: 2 (Alaves)
Third kits used: 3 (Rayon Vallecano)
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Top 6
- Real Madrid
- Barcelona
- Villarreal
- Atlético Madrid
- Athletic Bilbao
- Real :poop:
Bottom 3
- Levante
- Oviedo
- Girona
Sevilla final position - 17th
Top la liga scorer - Mbappe
Top Sevilla scorer - Vargas
Copa del Rey winners - Barcelona
Champions league winners - Liverpool
Europa league winners - Roma
Conference league winners - Crystal Palace
Best overall Sevilla player - Vargas
How many Sevilla managers sacked - 1
How many times will we be wearing the 3rd-kit in La Liga?: 2
How many official games with participation of Sevilla FC will be played in a foreign (ie NOT Spain) country: 0
Will Nianzou and Marcao play a combined total of more than 2 hours of football (Copa del Rey and La Liga)? Yes
I had us 18th but I couldn’t do it so changed. I have got us just escaping in 17th. God willing! Think it will be extremely close. Heart over head! lol
So, let’s check the numbers here. While clearly money isn’t everything in football, I think we’d all agree that the reason RM and Barca are always top isn’t precisely because they’re just more committed squads and better management, coaches, etc. Money is a big part of predicting where a club will end in the table.
So it’s with that pretext that I share an admittedly error-uncorrected AI table of Transfermarkt squad values:
| Rank | Club | Total Squad Market Value (Sept 1, 2025) |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Real Madrid | €1.40 billion |
| 2 | FC Barcelona | €1.13 billion |
| 3 | Atlético Madrid | €603.80 million |
| 4 | Athletic Club | €367.40 million |
| 5 | Real Sociedad | €277.20 million |
| 6 | Villarreal CF | €248.00 million |
| 7 | Real :poop: | €154.00 million |
| 8 | Valencia CF | €151.10 million |
| 9 | Girona FC | €147.10 million |
| 10 | Sevilla FC | €135.60 million |
| 11 | RC Celta | €120.50 million |
| 12 | RCD Espanyol | €88.50 million |
| 13 | RCD Mallorca | €83.60 million |
| 14 | CA Osasuna | €80.90 million |
| 15 | Getafe CF | €78.50 million |
| 16 | Rayo Vallecano | €74.60 million |
| 17 | Alavés | €67.20 million |
| 18 | Real Oviedo | €51.70 million |
| 19 | Levante UD | €39.05 million |
| 20 | Elche CF | €38.75 million |
I took a look at the figures my LLM used to complete this figure, and updated the final squad list, which ended with a slightly lower final figure (€114m). Surely we’re not the only club doing last minute sales, so assuming for a moment no change in the other squads, here’s how we land with a corrected final squad list with today’s final squad list. 11th, just behind RC Celta Vigo.
So yeah, does this team look on paper like a Europa League or Conference League qualifying team? Nope, no it does not.
But is there plenty of reason to believe we should land somewhere near the middle of the table? You betcha!
I’m sticking with my above prediction of 10th.
Injuries and plenty of other unknowns will play a big oart, so I’m certainly not confident we magically deserve 10th or will coast into 10th, but it’s hard to make and argument that our squad quality is somehow terrible or significantly worse than last year’s Sept 1 squad.
Let’s Vamos!
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Top 6
- Barcelona
- R. Madrid
- Atlético
- Villarreal
- Criaturas
- R. Sociedad
Bottom 3
18. Girona
19. Levante
20. R. Oviedo
Sevilla FC final position in the table: 11th
final position in the table: 5th
Topscorer La Liga: Mbappe
Topscorer La Liga (Sevilla FC): Akor
Copa del Rey winner: Barcelona
Champions League winner: Barcelona
Europa League winner: Roma
Conference League winner: Crystal Palace
Best signing Sevilla FC (including canteras with LESS than 10 games as per today): Suazo
Best player overall (Sevilla FC): Mendy
How many managers will be sacked during the season (Sevilla FC)?: 0
How many times will we be wearing the 3rd-kit in La Liga?: 5
How many official games with participation of Sevilla FC will be played in a foreign (ie NOT Spain) country: 0
Will Nianzou and Marcao play a combined total of more than 2 hours of football (Copa del Rey and La Liga)?: Yes
Bummed that everyone missed my hijacked additions to the classic @Niller predictions list. In case anyone is game for the added competition:
- Who will be the first La Liga manager to be sacked?
- Which player will win the “Zarra Trophy” (top Spanish scorer in La Liga)?
- What will be the final score of the highest-scoring Getafe home game of the season?
- Which team will be the “surprise package” of the season, finishing at least 4 places higher than most pundits predict?
- Over/Under 15.5 total cards (yellows + reds) issued in the two El Gran Derbi league matches between Sevilla and ?
- Will Diego Simeone wear an outfit that is NOT entirely black for a La Liga touchline appearance?
- Which is more likely to happen this season: wins a trophy or Joaquín runs for mayor of El Puerto de Santa María?
Top 6
- Real Madrid
- Barcelona
- Atletico
- Athletic Bilbao
- Villarreal
- :poop:
Bottom 3
18. Mallorca
19. Oviedo
20. Levante
Sevilla FC final position in the table: - 13
final position in the table: - 6
Topscorer La Liga: - Mbape
Topscorer La Liga (Sevilla FC): - Adams
Copa del Rey winner: - Athletic Club
Champions League winner: - Liverpool
Europa League winner: - Lille
Conference League winner: - Crystal Palace
Best signing Sevilla FC (including canteras with LESS than 10 games as per today): Suazo
Best player overall (Sevilla FC): - Vargas
How many managers will be sacked during the season (Sevilla FC)?: - 0
How many times will we be wearing the 3rd-kit in La Liga?: - 4
How many official games with participation of Sevilla FC will be played in a foreign (ie NOT Spain) country: - 0
Will Nianzou and Marcao play a combined total of more than 2 hours of football (Copa del Rey and La Liga)?: - YES
- Who will be the first La Liga manager to be sacked? - Sergio Francisco
- Which player will win the “Zarra Trophy” (top Spanish scorer in La Liga)? - Nico Williams
- What will be the final score of the highest-scoring Getafe home game of the season? 3-3
- Which team will be the “surprise package” of the season, finishing at least 4 places higher than most pundits predict? - I don’t know what pundits predict, but I think Elche is going to be a tough out for everyone this year.
- Over/Under 15.5 total cards (yellows + reds) issued in the two El Gran Derbi league matches between Sevilla and ? - Over
- Will Diego Simeone wear an outfit that is NOT entirely black for a La Liga touchline appearance? - Nope
- Which is more likely to happen this season: wins a trophy or Joaquín runs for mayor of El Puerto de Santa María? - Joaquin annouces mayorship naked.
- Who will be the first La Liga manager to be sacked? Paunovic (Oviedo)
- Which player will win the “Zarra Trophy” (top Spanish scorer in La Liga)? Lamine Yamal
- What will be the final score of the highest-scoring Getafe home game of the season? 0-3 (forfeit)
- Which team will be the “surprise package” of the season, finishing at least 4 places higher than most pundits predict? Sevilla
- Over/Under 15.5 total cards (yellows + reds) issued in the two El Gran Derbi league matches between Sevilla and ? OVER
- Will Diego Simeone wear an outfit that is NOT entirely black for a La Liga touchline appearance? NO
- Which is more likely to happen this season: wins a trophy or Joaquín runs for mayor of El Puerto de Santa María? Joaquín for Mayor
Based on nothing but third-hand vibes, let me get in on the action.
- Barcelona
- Real Madrid
- Bilbao
- Atletico
- Sociedad
- :poop:
Weird, without text in the middle it made the numbering continue. But these are my bottom three.
- Girona
- Levante
- Oviedo
I’m going optimistic while everyone (mostly) else goes despondent and picking us to land 13th.
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Top 6
- Barca
- Real Madrid
- Atletico
- Athletic Club Bilbao
- Villareal
- Real :poop:
Bottom 3
18. Levante
19. Girona
20. Real Oviedo
Sevilla FC final position in the table: Bang average: 12
final position in the table: 6
Topscorer La Liga: Mbappe
Topscorer La Liga (Sevilla FC): Dodi… oh well… Isaac Romero!
Copa del Rey winner: Real Madrid
Champions League winner: PSG
Europa League winner: Aston Villa
Conference League winner: Rayon Vallecano
Best signing Sevilla FC (including canteras with LESS than 10 games as per today): Suazo
Best player overall (Sevilla FC): Vargas
How many managers will be sacked during the season (Sevilla FC)?: 0
How many times will we be wearing the 3rd-kit in La Liga?: 3
How many official games with participation of Sevilla FC will be played in a foreign (ie NOT Spain) country: 0
Will Nianzou and Marcao play a combined total of more than 2 hours of football (Copa del Rey and La Liga)?: Yes
Who will be the first La Liga manager to be sacked? The one from Levante
Which player will win the “Zarra Trophy” (top Spanish scorer in La Liga)? Lamine Yamal
What will be the final score of the highest-scoring Getafe home game of the season? 3-0
Which team will be the “surprise package” of the season, finishing at least 4 places higher than most pundits predict? Rayon Vallecano
Over/Under 15.5 total cards (yellows + reds) issued in the two El Gran Derbi league matches between Sevilla and ? Under
Will Diego Simeone wear an outfit that is NOT entirely black for a La Liga touchline appearance? No
Which is more likely to happen this season: wins a trophy or Joaquín runs for mayor of El Puerto de Santa María? The latter
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No idea if it’s still September 4th at your place but there’s 15 minutes before it hits September 5th here, so here goes.
Top 6
1.Barcelona
2.Real Madrid
3.Atletico
4.Bilbao
5.Real :poop:
6.Villarreal
Bottom 3
18. Elche
19. Levante
20. Oviedo
Sevilla FC final position in the table: 16th (Sevilla’s loan army ensure Elche are doomed)
final position in the table: 5th
Topscorer La Liga: Mbappe at the expense of Real
Topscorer La Liga (Sevilla FC): Alfon Gonzalez (Adams really doesn’t cut it for me)
Copa del Rey winner: Bilbao
Champions League winner: Real Madrid
Europa League winner: Roma
Conference League winner: Crystal Palace
Best signing Sevilla FC (including canteras with LESS than 10 games as per today): Alfon Gonzalez
Best player overall (Sevilla FC): Agoume
How many managers will be sacked during the season (Sevilla FC)?: 0
How many times will we be wearing the 3rd-kit in La Liga?: 5
How many official games with participation of Sevilla FC will be played in a foreign (ie NOT Spain) country: 0
Will Nianzou and Marcao play a combined total of more than 2 hours of football (Copa del Rey and La Liga)? : Yes, 2 hours and 15 minutes combined
A mix of realism (standings) and fantasy (Marcao and Nianzou), since not a lot of players have made their International teams for obvious reasons they have some time to gel and get to know each other better.
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Marcao minutes against Athletic: 8
Marcao minutes against Girona: 6
Nianzou minutes against Elche: 60
Marcao minutes against Elche: 90.
DONE DEAL!
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By the end of today’s match, looks like Marcao and Nianzou will break the 2 hours combined. Lucky for all of us, no one responded “NO” to that prediction question.
PS - I came here to shame whomever said “NO” to that question, but apparently I can only “shame” @Niller for daring to ask the question, lol.
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If they end up becoming a Diego Carlos-Koundé partnership I’ll take it.
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Some of y’all already losing points in that question about how many times Sevilla will wear the third kit. Apparently someone in position of power likes the third kit, we’ve barely used the red one
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That’s because it has that good-awful collar…
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Coming at you from 40,000 feet above the Atlantic, it’s Charts with Steve! 
Believe it or not, we’re off to our best start since 2021/22.
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First manager to be sacked: the one from Oviedo
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